I was a camp counselor at Camp All American, loving each day and every memory I made, spending all day in the sun, playing with my campers and teaching about God's grace. Surrounded my amazing brothers and sisters in Christ, there was little to complain about, but somehow anxiety crept its way in. I found myself entangled (so it seemed at the time) by fellow college counselors who had their whole future planned out. As I listened to their intricate plans of job descriptions, living locations and housing floor plans, I began to worry about my future. Why wasn't mine all figured out? I needed a plan, so I looked into every possible option. I researched job titles and descriptions ... and consequently denied every possible form of employment. With no possible outcomes, I was lost. I had no idea where my future was going and began to dream up elaborate stories about living under bridges (I tend to make rather quick, drastic assumptions--My mom likes to call me "dramatic").
Finally, the obvious answer (but apparently invisible to me?) found me. It was a hot June night after a long week of camp. I was in a tree house laying in my hammock with some of my great friends. I was telling stories about camp, our traditions and talking about my campers. I talked about two of my favorite campers and their stories, both of who, like me, had parents who had passed away recently.
I loved connecting with them and crying with them and talking about how though we were somewhat parentless, we still have the perfect Father. These were different types of relationships than I had ever had before, such a deep, raw connections that very few I know understand. As I talked about how much I loved these girls and how much of a "God thing" it was that I ended up at camp, my good friend Shelby said "you know, God's plans are better than our wildest dreams." Smack. Conviction. I laughed at my failed attempt to "plan" my future with my Father's input.
I went home that night completely aware of what I had to do, so I knelt down, and poured out my frustrations and there it was like a power point in my head. Not expecting any sort of answer, I was surprised to see a single word in orange block letters appeared: ORPHANS. So what the heck did that mean? I asked again and began to day dream with the Lord the meaning of this riddle. My answer did not come that night nor the next. So the waiting period began.
Three Months Ago, I got my second clue.
Africa. It was as simple as that.
I was sitting at my boyfriend's desk while he was talking to me about a book. It was written about life in Sudan and a single man's attempt to fight against African warlords. As I flipped through the book, he continued speaking. I turned directly to the center and saw three African children staring back at me. Orphaned by the destruction of these warlords, these children's eyes begged for hope and love, something I knew I had too much of not to give away. I was so overcome by emotion that I began to cry. The extreme desire the Lord had put in my heart to minister to the fatherless was undeniably strong. Finally I knew where He wanted me to go. I didn't know how, but as I explained my story of Orphans and consequential tears to my very confused boyfriend, there was no doubt in my mind ... I was going to Africa.
The following weeks consisted of researching and looking into missions. After lots of prayer and constant contact with the organization, I knew my time had to be spent with Choose to Invest. The Journey project sounded incredible! I even had a fellow CAA camp counselor who had traveled to Kenya with Journey in 2011 and promised it would be an incredible experience. I couldn't wait and there was not one doubt in my mind! I had hope. I was going to Kenya.
So after a faulty internet connection, differing time zones and long term missionaries traveling to and from Nairobi, the Lord made sure my application arrived on time (even though it shouldn't have) and I received my interviews. Finally the day came and acceptances were going to be announced.
When my phone rang a little after three in the afternoon, I could feel the adrenaline pumping in my knees. I felt woozy, like I was going to faint, but somehow managed to answer the phone. But instead of a yes, I heard a maybe. God hadn't told the staff at Choose to Invest a definite yes for me nor a definite no. So I was asked to wait ... again.
The assumed two day period that it would take to receive a final answer spanned a week, and in that time, my hope dwindled. I began making back up plans for the summer. I'd work at camp again, still be with children and make money. I'd be comfortable. But as I was in the middle of finals week and studying for astronomy (so glad that class is over!), I received my answer. Choose to Invest asked me to go to Kenya with them!! This time I was blind sided. I assumed that when I didn't immediately receive an answer, maybe the Lord wanted me to spend my summer elsewhere. I was wrong. The Lord is not subject to time nor my wishes. The sovereign King had His own plan. A plan better than mine that drew me closer to him...
The Lord's plan proved faultless and in about five months, I'll be journeying to Kenya! I'm so excited. It still doesn't seem real. I'm excited to learn the dynamics of relationships in another country. I can not wait to see how such different people worship the same God. But what I'm most excited for is the opportunity I'll get to hold a child's hand or share a smile with them. I can't wait to overflow the love God has shown me into the people of another country.
Africa. It was as simple as that.
I was sitting at my boyfriend's desk while he was talking to me about a book. It was written about life in Sudan and a single man's attempt to fight against African warlords. As I flipped through the book, he continued speaking. I turned directly to the center and saw three African children staring back at me. Orphaned by the destruction of these warlords, these children's eyes begged for hope and love, something I knew I had too much of not to give away. I was so overcome by emotion that I began to cry. The extreme desire the Lord had put in my heart to minister to the fatherless was undeniably strong. Finally I knew where He wanted me to go. I didn't know how, but as I explained my story of Orphans and consequential tears to my very confused boyfriend, there was no doubt in my mind ... I was going to Africa.
The following weeks consisted of researching and looking into missions. After lots of prayer and constant contact with the organization, I knew my time had to be spent with Choose to Invest. The Journey project sounded incredible! I even had a fellow CAA camp counselor who had traveled to Kenya with Journey in 2011 and promised it would be an incredible experience. I couldn't wait and there was not one doubt in my mind! I had hope. I was going to Kenya.
So after a faulty internet connection, differing time zones and long term missionaries traveling to and from Nairobi, the Lord made sure my application arrived on time (even though it shouldn't have) and I received my interviews. Finally the day came and acceptances were going to be announced.
When my phone rang a little after three in the afternoon, I could feel the adrenaline pumping in my knees. I felt woozy, like I was going to faint, but somehow managed to answer the phone. But instead of a yes, I heard a maybe. God hadn't told the staff at Choose to Invest a definite yes for me nor a definite no. So I was asked to wait ... again.
The assumed two day period that it would take to receive a final answer spanned a week, and in that time, my hope dwindled. I began making back up plans for the summer. I'd work at camp again, still be with children and make money. I'd be comfortable. But as I was in the middle of finals week and studying for astronomy (so glad that class is over!), I received my answer. Choose to Invest asked me to go to Kenya with them!! This time I was blind sided. I assumed that when I didn't immediately receive an answer, maybe the Lord wanted me to spend my summer elsewhere. I was wrong. The Lord is not subject to time nor my wishes. The sovereign King had His own plan. A plan better than mine that drew me closer to him...
"For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts higher than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:9
The Lord's plan proved faultless and in about five months, I'll be journeying to Kenya! I'm so excited. It still doesn't seem real. I'm excited to learn the dynamics of relationships in another country. I can not wait to see how such different people worship the same God. But what I'm most excited for is the opportunity I'll get to hold a child's hand or share a smile with them. I can't wait to overflow the love God has shown me into the people of another country.
Truly though, the journey begins now. I can not wait to see what the Lord teaches me through the process of fundraising, praying and preparation. I'm nervous and already feel incredibly inadequate, but I know that the Lord equips who He deems ready. So bring it on! I'm ready for the journey ahead and am so excited to see how I emerge--further molded and shaped by more intimately experiencing the Lord. I hope you guys are excited to tag along too and see how my journey with Journey ensues!
In Him,
Catherine
